Lila's Locale

I intended to make myself an awesome rockabilly pin-up girl costume, but then life happened, so I will once again be dressed as slutty strawberry shortcake.

Here’s 13 Halloween Costumes that Rock:

1. Candy Corn Witch

2. Chick with whip

I don’t know what she’s actually supposed to be but she has a whip and cute shoes. That’s all I need!

3.  Slutty Snow White

4. Fire fighter

very appropriate for So Cal right now

5. Crazy Girl

HA! Jokes on them, I don’t need a costume for this one…

6. Gypsy Pirate type chick

7. Pirate Wench

8. Fuck Pirate Wench: PIRATE CAPTAIN! HELL YEA!!

AND NOW FOR SMALL CHILDREN

I would like to say that I fully support small children being dressed up as cute things for the amusement of adults.

9.  Piglet

Heheh it’s cute!

10. Small flying thing

11. Ladybug

12. Pumpkin

13. Carebear!!!!!!!!!

Sorry this is late and that I haven’t been around, but October is Hell Month at my job.

If you, like me, are going to end up sleeping at your office here are the things you should know:

1. The floor is hard – don’t sleep on your side
2. It will be cold, even if you turned off the AC before you lay down
3. Binders make unconfortbale pillows
4. Have a toothbrush and toothpaste
5. Have spare clothes (they can be ugly ones…)
6. Random cloth items in the office (tote bags, sweaters, etc) also make bad pillows
7. You must set a wake up call – meaning someone to actually call you
8. You should time stamp eveything by sending emails to people at 4am
9. All buildings make scary noises at night
10. The sound of the security guard roaming the halls will scare the crap out of you
11. It won’t be full dark – but will be just dark enough to be scary
12. You won’t actually sleep, you’ll nap/passout
13. You will dream about work

1. Pretend it is your superhero identity
2. Accidentally sign it on work emails
3. Have stickers made that say property of pen name and stick them to friend’s butts.
4. Give it as your name while drunk at a bar
5. Allow your roommates to give it as their names to unattractive guys while drunk at a bar
6. Make your roommate wear a wig and pretend to be your pen name at a club where you are having a release party so you can go dance
7. Say you’re going to keep it a secret and tell everyone you know
8. Forget what it is and not respond to it
9. Snort and giggle when you get a caller who asks for your pen name
10. Have picked a name so silly that no one ever says it without long drawn out vowels
11. Use it as your SN in sex chat rooms
12. Give out you YIM pen name SN to people you met in sex chat rooms
13. Begin torrid online affair with hot irishman as your pen name

Bonus points if you can guess which ones I’ve done/am doing.

1. Played penny slots

2. Dipped my toes in Lake Tahoe (it was cold)

3. Got a sunburn

4. Avoided the rolling blackouts in LA

5. Finished the newest Gaylene Foley

6. Didn’t read my book for class Monday

7. Finished the monster story

8. Tortured Kate because she was at work while I wasn’t

9. Didn’t go shopping (damn it, missed the sales)

10. Went wine tasting

11. Bought peach truffles and ate them

12. Got Kitties! (okay, they’re my brothers, but they are soooooo cute!)

13. Obsessively checked for reviews of Sealed with a Kiss and had a breakdown when Mrs. G scolded me.

If you’re bored waiting for my Friday short story release (Sealed with a Kiss,) here are thirteen things for you to do and read. From random links to bad puns and pick-up lines, this week I’m all about the distraction.

1. I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him $50 that he couldn’t reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, ‘no, the steaks are too high.’
2. Pop virtual bubble wrap
3. Are you an alien?, because you just abducted my heart.
4. Get Virtually Married. I just married Harrison Ford.
5. How to annoy someone on the elevator: Hum the theme from Mission Impossible with yours eyes darting around the elevator.
6. My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn’t concentrate.
7. Song Tapper
8. Hey, how’s it going? Do you see my friend over there? He wants to know if you think I’m cute.
9. Click to make them divide, repeat until mesmerized and brain-dead.
10. I used to be a tennis instructor, but it just wasn’t my racket.
11. Tongue Twister: “Sheath thy sword,” the surly sheriff said, “or surely shall a churlish serf soon shatter thee.”
12. Color
13. LAST BUT NOT LEAST: Go read the Excerpt for Sealed with a Kiss

Link back to RHI for more TT

Here are some cool quotes for you this fine Thursday!

1.  What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?
   Ursula K. LeGuin
2. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
   Redd Foxx
3. The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans are suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they’re okay, then it’s you.
   Rita Mae Brown
4. There is a level of cowardice lower than that of the conformist: the fashionable non-conformist.
   Ayn Rand
5. To confine our attention to terrestrial matters would be to limit the human spirit.
   Stephen W. Hawking
6. The difference between genius and insanity is that genius has its limits.
   Albert Einstein
7. Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who would want to live in an institution?
   H.L. Mencken
8. Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
   Mark Twain
9. If you don’t want to work, you have to work to earn enough money so that you won’t have to work.
   Ogden Nash
10. One of the lessons of history is that Nothing is often a good thing to do and always a clever thing to say.
    Will Durant
11. People used to explore the dimensions of reality by taking LSD to make the world look weird.
    Now the world is weird and they take Prozac to make it look normal.
    Bangstrom
12. We spend the first twelve months of our children’s lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.
    Phyllis Diller
13. Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac.
    George Carlen

Here it is, the official list of kinky things I want to include in future books!

1. Ice

As Kate is evil (but sick right now, I’m sorry I broke you my kate!) and cut my sex-with-ice scene in Savage (stay tuned I will post it closer to the release day) I want to give it another go.

2. Kitchen Play

There are a seriously interesting number of things to do in a kitchen during sex. And all you freaks who are thinking of knifes need to take a step back. I’m talking about wooden spoons, fruits and veggies, spices… Oh yes. All good.

3. Sex on Cars

Not in cars, but on them. A really shiny nice paint job… oh yes, that is hot.

4. Sex with an ipod vibrator

I’m in love with mine, so awesome.

5. Silk Scarf bondage

They’re something unexpectedly romantic about silk scarf bondage. Actually, I did write about this one, but we’ll have to wait and see if it was actually good.

6. Prisoner Play

Time off for good behavior anyone?

7. Hostage psycho drama

I’ve always wanted to read (notice this one I don’t think I can write) a story about hostage kidnapper romance, where you aren’t even sure if it’s love or Stockholm Syndrome until the end. Creepy, yet sexy.

8. Silence

Absolute silence during sex, not the awkward, I’m too uncomfortable to say anything silence, but silence as a sort of bondage. You really want to say something, but can’t.

9. Film

Not some shitty home video, but a well shot, artistic, sex video, maybe a solo video

10. Display

One partner serving as a display, either home art or serving dishes.

11. Courtly love

Okay so there would be no real sex, but the whole love for afar and fight for you and die thing is really hot.

12. Unknown partner

A partner you cannot see, whom you don’t know, but whose touch brings you incredible pleasure. Oh yea, that’s good.

13. Foot fetish

I deeply love my shoes, and don’t see why boys shouldn’t also love them… while they’re on my feet

People/Things that have been Irritating this Week 

Romanceland is causing my teeth to grind right now. Seriously girls, grow up, get it together, and let’s be productive and proactive. 

Whining

Quit whining. Rant and rave a bit, get it out of your system. Then, SHUT UP and do something to FIX the problem. If all you do is rant and rave, you are a bigger problem than the original issue. 

Complaining instead of Brainstorming

If someone asks you to brainstorm suggestions for improvement, do not continued the same tired litany of complaints. If you can’t think of anything better, did it ever occur to you that there is no easy repair? 

Ignorance

If you really don’t have any idea what goes into something, don’t say “They should be able to…” Really, they should? How exactly is that going to work? 

Pushing a Personal Agenda

Again, when I ask for brainstorming on a specific topic, don’t push for what you want for yourself, or something that would only work for your specific situation.  

Selfishness

Inspired by above. Seriously people. I know we all need to do our own promoting and such, but would it really hurt you to put an hour’s thought towards something without tying to make it a way for you to get ahead? 

Snotty Publishers

I’m sorry, but if I say “Hey, we’re brainstorming about e-book promotion, what’re your thoughts,” DO NOT tell me “Oh, well we’re doing our own thing, don’t need or want to be a part of anything else.” Lovely. I’m tying to brainstorm on something that eclipses individual publisher promotion, and you blow me off. How would this have hurt you? It wouldn’t have, but you’re response sure disappointed me. I could not be more unenthusiastic about you as a pub right now.   

Okay I ran out of things that make me angry (at least on this topic,) so I’m going to stop. Thursday 7… close enough.

Hmm, I suddenly see why people are addicted to ranting on their blogs, very cathartic.

Alright, whoo, got that out of my system, now back to research, making plans, and prepping a proposal. Go Team!